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One day I was tweeting something and I thought it might be fun to open up a new Twitter account under the name "God" and tweet stuff like this. The name had already been taken, of course, probably about 18 seconds after Twitter was invented. I don't follow God on Twitter so I can't say what he/she is using it for. Other examples of what I might have tweeted as God:
Just cured a guy of leprosy, gave about 7 million other people cancer.
I could stop wars anytime I want but without cable, what would I watch?
Dave, if you're going to cheat on your wife, I'm going to introduce her to a hot trainer at the gym.
Hurricane Katrina wasn't about the iniquities of New Orleans. I was trying to teach you how to build a decent levee.
No prayers this weekend, please, I'm taking some time off.
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I have never worn a gold chain in my life, but I do have earrings. Still, it was fun to be a part of Family Circus.