Bizarro is brought to you today by People Who Want To Save You.
Who doesn't want to be saved? Life is hard. Bad things happen to us, we get ourselves into jams we wish we hadn't and can't see the way out. Wouldn't it be great if someone or something could come along and snatch you up out of the poo pit you've fallen into and make everything all better? (Answer on page 372)
For those of you without a page 372 on your computer, the answer is, "yes." That's why humans have always been in love with saviors. What's not to love?
The downside is that some people will try to save you against your will, with the savior of their choice. This can be anything from uncomfortable to annoying to dangerous.
I wish being saved were simpler. I wish my life, like my computer, would kick into a screensaver mode after I've left it unattended for five minutes. Just put everything on hold and make sure nothing gets changed or damaged while I'm not looking.
I don't, however, want to have to replace my life with a new one every four years so it will work with new applications. There are too many humans as it is.