Today's Bizarro cartoon comes to you courtesy of The Internets.
I have two daughters, but if I'd had a son, I desperately wanted to name him "Popeye." What boy wouldn't want to be named Popeye? I'd have loved it. But, alas, their mother was a ball-buster and I gave in to her naming choices: Krelspeth and Krapuzar. Hence the "K2" in many of my cartoons. (in this one, on the water pitcher)
I'm friends with a breeding couple – her last name is Lortz, his last name is Lutz (no kidding) – and they had a baby boy. I pleaded with them to name him Lars Lortz-Lutz, but they resisted.
I'm against human reproduction of any kind, because the last thing this planet needs is more arrogant consumers and the misery and pollution that we cause. But if you insist on producing crotch fruit, please consider giving it a humorous name. It is character-building for the child and makes the world a funnier place.